CAN'T WAIT

my friend peter shared this amazing two-part jam with me. the first is 'can't wait' by yuki hsu in a collabo with yoo seung jun. this vid has a lot of swagger, smooth street dance vibes and some heartbroken longing looks. and of course a metallic blue jumpsuit and circular mirrored sunglasses! bonus: one of the main locations used in the video is a chili's!!! it really doesn't get more classy than that, does it? the second video titled 'hay nghe anh mot lan' is a remake by a very powerful duo who move the action from chili's to the parking lot. and they ditch the jumpsuit for a snug sweater with a heart print on it and some bandannas - so much more street cred that way. and you know the hearthrob of the group has to be the one with blonde frosted tips at the end of his mullet.

THIERRY PASTOR

thierry pastor is a mustachioed french man with a voice as big as his heart. i don't know what that means, i just felt like saying it. in his video for 'le coup de folie' he shifts back and forth while passionately singing in front of a giant pink record. boring yet enertaining. the second performance of the song 'sur de musiques noires' is supposed to feature thierry and his musical talents, but everybody really knows that the true star of the show is the dancing saxophonist!!! the moves that guy has are HI-LARIOUS, like as in i cannot contain a smile of joy while watching this video by myself. love his armwarmers and hot bod. seriously, is this guy still around and can i hire him to follow me around all day as a dancing bodyguard?! also i love that the actual saxophone is like a prop that he pretends to jam with for like 20 seconds. a-may-zing.

LOS CONQUISTADORES

oh...my...god me gusta mucho los conquistadores de ecuador. how can you not love guys who dress up in donkey ears and tails and dance around with huge smiles while wearing white matching fringed outfits? and omg the shaved head/long ponytail in the back combo is always a killer. the closeup shot of them wiggling their little donkey tail booties is priceless. im guessing 'mi conejito' is their biggest hit because they made more than one video for it - the second one has los conquistadores not only dressed up as donkeys but also in giant ponchos rockin out on top of a police car!!! in the last video for 'mentirosa' they ditched all their funny clothes and went for smooth, slick pink shiny button ups and some high-kicking dance moves. actually it's more like an aerobic routine than actual dancing. i love them.

8 ARMS TO HOLD YOU

holy schnikes this is a wacked out video. yes, the plot involves a pet octopus that grows giant, eats the entire contents of a refrigerator, hears a cry for help from his owner who is on a band audition, then comes to her rescue and pushes off all the other aggressive auditioners. then the octopus makes it into the band and becomes a worldwide musical sensation. i don't know about you but i think '8 arms to hold you' could make a fabulous movie that would kill at the box office! i'll direct and star if someone provides the funds and supplies an octopus as my co-star. p.s. my fave part of the video is when the octopus dramatically pulls back and catapults out of the window at 3:06. and the guy's mohawk that looks like a fish gill.

SANDY MARTON

i swear to gawd, any 80s cheesy song with a middle eastern theme is so frickin catchy! 'camel by camel' by sandy marton has a rather perplexing title - i have no idea what he's talking about and i really don't think he does either. but it makes up for a lame title with a bangin beat! i like the girls who do weird swirly thrusty choreography in leggings and sequined tops, and i like the closeup shots of the shirts spinning with magical musical motion. the flying carpet graphics are awesome.

VAMOS A LA PLAYA PERO NO TENGO DINERO

i love the two dudes in righeira. they just do their own thing, dancing in place with pretend radios on their wrists, freezing in motion at random times, and repeating the phrase 'vamos a la playa' about 5,000 times in one song. something tells me they could keep performing the same routine and made this song last for 40 minutes. 'no tengo dinero' follows pretty much the same formula as the first song, except the video is frickin amazing!!!! like serious animation 80s magical otherworldly inspiration. like srsly i get so much lifeforce energy from watching this video.

SAMANTHA SANG

samantha sang puts on quite a show when she sings. but not in a good way. somehow i found a video of her performing 'how am i supposed to live without you' from 1999, when she was a few years past her prime. the delay between sound and video actually makes it more hilarious, and the fierce faces she makes are killer. the background scenery is so dreamy magical i want to live in it. although i can picture the creepy clown from the video with baby fergie gazing through one of the windows. the video for her big hit 'emotion' gets a little freaky when two of her appear with insanely fluffy feathered hair.

DON'T WORRY IT WILL BE OK!!!

PUMPTHATJAM WILL HAVE ALL IMAGES BACK ON THURSDAY! DO NOT FRET!!! IT WILL BE OK!!!!! WE WILL ALL MAKE IT THROUGH THIS DIFFICULT TIME!!!!!

TOP ONE

top one is a polish supergroup that has absolutely horrible music videos. which is why i love them. 'santa maria' starts off with a catchy beat, flashing lights, and robotic eastern european disco dance moves. add in some backup dancers with belly shirts and you're good to go. 'mila moja' features some more belly baring dancers, but this time they appear on tv screens behind the singer's strangely vacant face. all that dude's charisma comes from his bowl cut. lastly is a black and white video from top one's early career called 'zaopiekuj sie mna.' the parts with the shirtless beefy dreamboat in the leather jacket and floral pajama pants is i think my FAVORITE DANCE SEQUENCE EVER. this one's going in all time faves.

BAD BOYS BLUE

bad boys blue is a white hot trio of musical powerhouses. kind of. well, not exactly. but they are a trio. 'love takes me there' has the bad boys blue trying to escape from a russian prison and all sharing a redhead love interest. 'a world without you (michelle)' is a slammin live performance. my fave part is around 2:00 when michelle appears, does a slinky dance and sings three sentences in french. somehow i had 'you're a woman' on my itunes forever and had no idea who it was by, so now i know! if there ever was such a thing as reggae disco this would be it. here's a bonus video, 'how i need you.' the dude with dreads isn't in this vid :(.

p.s. bad boys blue have a song called 'i totally miss you.' that's totally amazing.

SPOOKEY RUBEN

my friend from theneedledrop.com shared this fabulous music video with me. it's called 'wendy mcdonald' by spookey ruben and it's just as weird as you would expect. it features a lot of red jumpsuits, flying cheeseburgers, and a very scary female version of ronald mcdonald that actually just looks like a man with pippi longstocking pigtails, which is really a copy of the girl in the wendy's logo!! confusing. this song is so horrible that i don't even want to download it and listen to it in an ironic way.